10 things I’ve learned from installing tiles and flooring

  1. 5 minutes in a hot tub is better than 30 in the shower for removing mastic, grout, mud, and dirt from your body.
  2. Drywallers don’t know the meaning of “accuracy” or “precision.” (See #3)
  3. A wall that is out of square by less than a 1/2 inch per 100 feet can make your day 3x longer and more frustrating.
  4. 1/32″ is actually a very large distance.
  5. Getting in the work truck after a 12 hour shift will make you feel guilty that you’re putting in such a short day.
  6. Tiling floors and walls is actually kind of interesting and fun if you have minor ocd and a strong penchant for attention to tiny details.
  7. Putting the grout on those same tiles will make you want to stick the business end of a large-gauge shotgun in your mouth.
  8. Good kneepads are worth every penny – the more you spend on them, the younger you feel at the end of the day.
  9. Clean non-work clothes will last you about a week per set, as you will spend no more than two hours per day in them, and most of that time is spent in a restaurant eating.
  10. Install tile or flooring for a week and your life is changed forever. You will spend the rest of your life looking at the corners and doors of any room you are in, checking to see how much fudging the installer did, and pointing out differences of 1/16″ or a couple of degrees.